Is it okay for a Christian wife to enjoy sex?

Sexual intimacy is about so much more than just the physical pleasure—but sometimes we diminish the value of this pleasure just because it is physical.

God designed us to experience sexual enjoyment. With over 8,000 nerve endings, the clitoris exists only for sexual pleasure.

Despite God’s clear intention for us to experience sexual pleasure, many women struggle to fully enjoy the physical pleasure that comes with sex. (I am not talking here about struggling to experience an orgasm, which I’ve written about here.)
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Escape to the mountains. Genesis 19:17

Finding encouragement for marriage growth in the bible isn’t exactly unexpected. However, I was somewhat surprised to find such encouragement as I was reading about the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. Read More →

What is your husband saying that you might be misunderstanding?

Alone in the car for a long drive recently, I turned on the radio to find some music that would help me stay alert.

I landed on a classic oldies station (meaning every single song was something from my youth).

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I’m so excited to get to share with you about a new resource that will be launching six weeks from today: a podcast about sex, just for Christian wives.

Sex Chat for Christian Wives is a biblically-based podcast brought to you by Bonny Burns (Bonny’s OysterBed7), Gaye Christmus (Calm.Healthy.Sexy.), J Parker (Hot, Holy & Humorous), and yours truly.

A new podcast for Christian wives!

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In the difficult times in my life, my greatest accomplishment has seemed to be this: I survived. In fact, I sometimes think that would be a great epitaph for my gravestone, event though the gravestone would obviously contradict the words.

As I reflect on 2016 in terms of blogging, I would have to say the same thing: I survived. The blog is still here. Read More →

Merry Christmas!

I’ve been experiencing the usual busy-ness of December. The first few weeks are crunch time at work, and then I run into all the things I need to do to prepare for Christmas celebrations. Read More →

The benefits--and limits--of duty sex

A wife who’s resisted sex for a long time can face a tough journey when she begins to work on sexual intimacy.

The goal should be a thriving sexual relationship with her husband. Sometimes, though, it’s easier for a sexually reluctant wife to think of sex as little more than duty sex in which she allows her husband to have an orgasm with her body. Men report that this leaves them feeling emotionally empty and deprived—and honestly, it doesn’t do so much for us emotionally, either. (I’ve written about the downsides of duty sex here, here, here, and here.)

Getting comfortable with duty sex should not be the end goal for a wife who decides to work on sex.

However, duty sex isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes it is a helpful early step in a wife’s journey toward joyful sexual intimacy. Read More →

How can you nurture your sexual desire?

When I was young, I devoured the entire reproduction shelf in the children’s department at the library. My body was changing, and I wanted to know everything about those changes—and about sex.

It’s more than a little ironic that a lack of information contributed to the sex issues I had for years. Read More →

Lovely links

It’s time for a Loveliness of Links from last month!

Just like a loveliness of ladybugs all working can help cultivate a healthy garden, a loveliness of blog posts can help you cultivate a healthy—and intimate—marriage.

Enjoy these great posts from November!

  1. 10 Ways to Love Your Body–and Want to Share it With Your Husband! To Love, Honor & Vacuum
  2. 12 Things a Wife Should Do for Her Husband, Ashley Willis
  3. 4 Things to Say To Solve a Conflict, Nina Roesner
  4. 5 Things That You Should Stop Waiting For In Your Marriage, Ashley Willis
  5. 75 Ways to Love Your Life and Enjoy Your Marriage this Christmas – Free Ebook, Calm.Healthy.Sexy.
  6. Boredom in the Bedroom? The Generous Wife
  7. Does Sex Matter in a Marriage? Intimacy in Marriage
  8. Getting Your Spouse to Open Up! Video  Messy Marriage
  9. His Emotional Needs Are Wrapped Up In Sexual Intimacy with You, Bonny’s OysterBed7
  10. How One Woman Found Healing From Painful Sex…, Unveiled Wife
  11. Q&A with J: Surviving Childhood Rape & Building Sexual Intimacy, Hot, Holy & Humorous
  12. Sowing and Reaping, The Generous Wife
  13. Stop the Marriage Death Spiral, The Generous Wife
  14. The Only Way to Defeat Sexual Shame, To Love, Honor & Vacuum
  15. Themes of Injury, The Generous Wife
  16. Truth Telling Is a Prerequisite, Unveiled Wife
  17. Understanding our Differences, Awaken-Love
  18. What’s OK in the Bedroom? Authentic Intimacy
  19. When Emotional Pain Drives You to Mental Murder, Bonny’s OysterBed7
  20. Where Did My Sex Drive Go? To Love, Honor & Vacuum

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