10 Questions for a Husband Who Doesn’t Like Questions

Paul at The Generous Husband recently wrote a post of questions a couple can ask each other—and he challenged other marriage bloggers to come with their own list of questions.

I love the idea of asking Big Guy questions that could develop into interesting conversations. Read More →

How can you respond if your husband reacts negatively when you say no to sex?

Big Guy would approach me for sex. My response was usually some variation of no—rolling my eyes, listing all the things I need to get done first, or just saying the word “no.”

Quite often, after my negative response I would start to think about the possibility of sex. I wonder why I don’t think about sex like he does? I like sex well enough once we’re doing it. Hmm. I suppose that if I could just wrap up this stuff I’m working on, I might be able to do it. I just need some transition time. If he would come ask me again right this minute, I might be able to manage a yes. Where is he, anyway? For a guy who seems to want sex so much, shouldn’t he be here with me, spending time with me and helping me?
Read More →

Links to help you grow your marriage!

It’s time for a Loveliness of Links from last month!

Just like a loveliness of ladybugs all working can help cultivate a healthy garden, a loveliness of blog posts can help you cultivate a healthy—and intimate—marriage.

Enjoy these great posts from February.

  1. 10 Ways to Make Your Marriage a Priority, To Love, Honor, & Vacuum
  2. Emotional Affair: Guarding Your Heart as a Wife, Intentional Today
  3. Enthusiastic Sex = Greater Intimacy, To Love, Honor, & Vacuum
  4. Frenulum Orgasm – A New Delight for Him, Awaken-Love
  5. How Slowing Your Heart Transforms Your Marriage, Messy Marriage
  6. How to Plan your Evening to Experience a Remarkable Day, Encourage Your Spouse
  7. Libido: Figuring Out My Sexuality As a Wife, Intentional Today
  8. Love – The Doing Leads to the Feeling, The Generous Wife
  9. Move Mismatched Sex Drives Toward Better, Bonny’s OysterBed7
  10. My Husband Isn’t My Best Friend, Authentic Intimacy
  11. Q&A with J: “My Husband Is Addicted to Porn,” Hot, Holy & Humorous
  12. Role Models: Letting Go of The Past So It Doesn’t Ruin Your Present, Intentional Today
  13. Say It Out Loud to Melt Your Beloved’s Heart, Bonny’s OysterBed7
  14. Sensual to Sexual, The Generous Wife
  15. What Makes You Feel Sexy? Hot, Holy & Humorous
  16. When Resentment is Killing Your Sexual Intimacy, Intimacy in Marriage
  17. Why Do I Never Want to Say Yes When My Husband Initiates Sex? To Love, Honor, & Vacuum
  18. Why We Need Sexual Discipleship, Phylicia Delta
  19. Why You Should Try This Sex Position, Hot, Holy & Humorous
  20. Willing to be Adventurous, One-Flesh Marriage

Does it help us to view a porn habit as an addiction?

I’d like to preface this post with a few notes:

  • I am not in any way claiming scientific expertise here. I’ve done a lot of reading and research, but one of my points is that research doesn’t measure everything. If you’re looking for links to scientific studies, you won’t find them here.
  • Many women have a porn problem, too. I’m not addressing that in this post, although if this applies to you, you might find some insight.
  • As I talk about husbands quitting porn, I am referring to men who have a persistent porn habit that they want to quit.

Pornography hurts marriages. Women have shared with me the heartache they’ve experienced upon discovering a husband’s porn habit. It is common to feel hurt and betrayed.

Our shared sex life is where we are most vulnerable with our husbands. It is where we are most naked.

That same vulnerability that can make sex such an exquisite, connecting experience is what opens us up to being deeply hurt when it comes to anything sexual, including porn. Read More →

Practical Ways to Enjoy Plus-Size Sexual Intimacy

The biggest hurdle plus-size women face in the marriage bed isn’t our bodies . It is our feelings about our weight and size.

In my previous post, I reminded you that  you are fearfully and wonderfully made. God’s gift of sexual intimacy in marriage is for you just as it is for other women.

It is possible to enjoy a thriving marriage bed as a plus-size woman.

God designed us to enjoy sexual intimacy in the marriage bed—but that doesn’t mean it is always going to be a bed of roses.

Read More →

A plus-size woman can enjoy sexual intimacy.

Being a plus-size woman brings challenges in many areas of life—including the area of sexual intimacy.

I know first-hand how painful this subject can be.  I was a thin and active child, but when I was a young adult I began to put on weight. I am now quite overweight. Fortunately, Big Guy adores my curves and always has.  Yes, I want to be healthier. I would like to be thinner. For the most part, though, I’ve come to terms with my weight. This is who I am and how I look. This is the body I have right now, and it’s the one with which I live my life.

Still, writing this post is a struggle.  I’ve never had any problem sharing about the sexual intimacy in my marriage here. This feels different. Harder. More vulnerable. Nakeder. (I totally made that word up. It works.) I was not prepared how difficult this post would be to write.

I’m not going to lecture anyone about health here. We all know we need to be healthier.

I’d like to be honest about the unique sexual challenges we plus-size women face. In this post I’m going to talk specifically about body image and our feelings about our weight. I have a follow-up post that will address some physical realities of plus-size intimacy.

Read More →

Sex Chat for Christian Wives launches today!

Happy Valentine’s Day to you and your husband–and Happy Podcast Launch to J, Bonny, Gaye, and me!

We gave you a preview with our first episode last week, but today is the full launch of Sex Chat for Christian Wives. Read More →

Don't fear transformation in your marriage.

A caterpillar has its own charm, but God’s desire is for that caterpillar to experience a transformation and become a butterfly.

I doubt that the caterpillar knows to expect a transformation, but it does know to do the task it faces: spin the cocoon that allows the transformation to occur.

It emerges, with a brand new beauty and wings to fly.

I’ve been thinking about butterflies this week. Butterflies and death.

Read More →

Preparing for Launch!

I am so excited!

The new podcast I’m doing with the women behind Bonny’s Oysterbed 7, Calm.Healthy.Sexy., and Hot, Holy & Humorous launches on February 14.

That’s Valentine’s Day, folks—and it’s one week from today!

I expect it will take us a few episodes to hit our stride, but we are so ready for you to join us around the virtual table for a woman-to-woman chat about sexual intimacy in marriage.

We’ve recorded episodes on getting in the mood, stress, positions, exercise and sex, female sexual response, and more—and we have an awesome list of topics for future episodes.

If you’d like to be notified when new episodes go live, you can subscribe at sexchatforchristianwives.com. Also, follow our social media accounts:

Facebook
Twitter
Pinterest
Instagram

If you have a question or would like to suggest a topic for a future episode, go to our website, click on Have a Question?, and ask us questions you’d like to hear us discuss.

I’d like to ask for continuing prayers as we prepare for our launch.

We are so excited that we have a little preview for you. Click here to listen to our first episode, Getting in the Mood.

Enjoy!

A Loveliness of Links

It’s time for a Loveliness of Links from last month!

Just like a loveliness of ladybugs all working can help cultivate a healthy garden, a loveliness of blog posts can help you cultivate a healthy—and intimate—marriage.

Enjoy these great posts from January.

  1. 10 Ways to Talk So Your Husband Will Hear, To Love, Honor & Vacuum
  2. 20 Practical Romantic Resolutions For The Unromantic Husband, The Romantic Vineyard
  3. 9 Ways to Have a Rotten Sex Life, Jess Connell
  4. Are You Listening to What Your Spouse Says about Sex? Hot, Holy & Humorous
  5. Bucket List for Two, The Generous Wife
  6. Can Your Marriage Survive Without Sex? Intimacy in Marriage
  7. Favorite Sexy Marriage Articles of 2016, Calm.Healthy.Sexy.
  8. Find Peace So You Can Find Orgasm, Bonny’s OysterBed7
  9. Find Peace So You Can Find Orgasm, Bonny’s OysterBed7
  10. Hierarchy of Sex? Awaken-Love
  11. How and What to Pray for Your Spouse, Messy Marriage
  12. Intercourse Insight, Awaken-Love
  13. Naked and Hiding in the Bushes, Better Than the Honeymoon
  14. Open Your Heart to Understand, Encourage Your Spouse
  15. Porn Affects You, Even if You Don’t Look At It, Authentic Intimacy
  16. Q&A with J: Does He Know How Your Orgasm Works? Hot, Holy & Humorous
  17. Stop Being a Butthole Wife, Her View from Home
  18. Want More Joy in Your Life and Relationships? Follow These Three Simple Steps, Shaunti Feldhahn
  19. What’s the Purpose of Marriage? Authentic Intimacy
  20. Your Sexuality is Unique, The Generous Wife

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