The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake. Psalm 23:1-3 (NASB)
I’ve heard that the green pastures of the Holy Land don’t look anything like the endless rolling meadows I’ve always imagined, with nothing but green grass as far as the eye can see.
Instead, sprigs of grass grow here and there. It isn’t lush, but it is nourishing. It meets the needs of the shepherd’s flock, sustaining the sheep yet another day.
It is enough.
As I wrote in a recent post, life threw me for a loop for a while. To say that I haven’t been at my best is, well, an understatement.
I’m adjusting to a major move and am dealing with a grown son’s struggles. Then there’s COVID-19.
The virus has invaded the fabric of my daily life, even though my life doesn’t look much different than it did three months ago. My daily routine is the same as it was, but the rhythms of my life don’t look the same now. No church. No Bible study. No knitting group. I can’t visit my kids. My husband started his job as a truck driver just as our state began a shelter-in-place order. He uses hand sanitizer everywhere he goes, but who know what he might be exposed to? I’ve handsewn masks. I’ve made hand sanitizer. I’ve prayed for my elderly father-in-law to stay well, even as I have tried to be better company for him since he can’t visit with anyone else for a while.
This past year has been hard anyway. Now it has become even harder in ways I couldn’t have anticipated. I’ve carried stress and anxiety. I’ve grieved. I’ve had a few emotional meltdowns.
The past months have seen very few days when stress, grief, and negative feelings have been completely absent. These things are my nearly constant companion.
Yet I have noticed something else, something that amazes and uplifts me.
In the midst of all the sorrow and stress, every single day has brought me moments of peace, joy, and hope. I have struggled, yet God has clearly been right here with me.
God’s presence has not erased the difficulty, but it has helped me withstand it.
Peace, joy, and hope are not the only things I can see—but the peace, joy, and hope I have are enough to nourish me.
My Shepherd gets me through the day, each day, one day at a time.
With my Shepherd’s guidance and help, I have been able to maintain several practices that have sustained me.
Rest when I am weary and be gentle with myself.
When I start to feel worn out or worn down, I simply rest. I do things that bring me moments of happiness and quiet. I watch the birds (and squirrels) at my bird feeder. I’ve stopped being concerned about whether I’m doing a good or great job. I let it be okay that I am doing enough. I acknowledge my feelings and try not to dwell there—and if I find myself overwhelmed and crying, I don’t get upset that I couldn’t hold it all together.
In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety. Psalm 4:8
Rejoice in the positive while avoiding the negative.
I limit my news intake. I’ve muted people on Facebook so I don’t have to see their contentious posts show up on my feed. I make a point of watching things that show me how people are caring for others and being creative during this time. I look for things that are good to fill my mind and heart, and I limit my exposure to things that will cause distress.
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8
Read scripture.
When my emotions are in turmoil, I turn to the Book of Psalms. These scriptures remind me that my experiences are part of the human condition while also focusing my attention on Who God is.
You are my hiding place and my shield; I hope in your word. Psalm 119:114
Pray.
I’ve spent a lot of time in God’s presence, praying in different ways. Some prayer has been full of wordless weeping. Some prayer has been reading a psalm or the Lord’s Prayer aloud. I’ve prayed as I fill the bird feeder and as I knit prayer shawls.
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. Romans 8:26-27
These are the habits that get me through everything difficult. They got me through the hit my family took during the recession. They got me through a couple very difficult moves. They are getting me through the tsunami of my son’s incarceration and the stresses of COVID-19.
They are the same habits that got me through my struggles with sex. If working on your sex life is on your mind right now (and it’s okay if it isn’t), the posts below will show you how these practices worked for me there.
Resting when I am weary and being gentle with myself.
Rejoicing in the positive while avoiding the negative.
Reading scripture.
Praying.
We are all going to walk through shadowed valleys. Many of us are doing so right now as we figure out life during a pandemic, with whatever struggle and grief that might bring.
The green pastures and quiet waters might not look the same for all of us, so let God be your guide as you develop practices that sustain you.
He is your Shepherd who restores your soul.
Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Psalm 62:5
Image credit | jdblack at pixabay.com
I've moved! While you can peruse the archives here, I am no longer posting at The Forgiven Wife.
Please join me at Honeycomb & Spice.
Ladies, if you're interested in joining me for a study of Juli Slattery's new book God, Sex, and Your Marriage, time is running out! Our study begins with introductions on February 26, 2023, but the study will be open to join until March 5.
wow, (again!)
Thank you for giving us a little reminder that we have a Sheppard that leads us beside the still waters.
You remind me that whenever mounting challenges in life, are continually coming at us enough to feel like I’m in a deep emotional hole, we have a Father that will keep filling that hole with scoops of his mind soothing love, until that hole is filled.
I’m praying for God to sooth your family with the power of his love and comfort, to sooth minds and hearts.
Thank you. God has been doing a great deal of soothing in my family, and we have begun to see some growth we never expected.
Chris I have been wondering how you are doing. I know you have not blogged much and have hoped you were okay. I am sorry you have had so much on your plate but am thankful we have a God who is aways good and loves us no matter what. Your words have helped me a lot in my intimacy in my marriage and I cannot thank you enough. I pray for your husband as he drives his truck that the lord will protect him. I also pray for your son,And whatever is going on with him. Sending you a cyber hug.
Cat
Thank you for the prayers and the hug. I have seen God’s work in my son’s heart, and I think all will be well.
Chris, I don’t post much but have followed your blog a long time and subscribe to Honeycomb and Spice. My stepson was incarcerated 20 years ago and went to prison. He was sentenced to 10 yrs, then the judge cut it to 5, and then to 3. Out of 3 he served 1. He’s been out a long time and us doing outstanding. While I was focused on “being strong” “for the family” ( don’t kid yourself, I was shoving a lot inside) my DH was emotionally a wreck. We went through such dark hours, and many prayers on knees, which God honored, and the stress was often unbearable. Every decision we made seemed to go back to him and his situation. The dark cloud followed us everywhere. When a family member is incarcerated it’s like the whole family is. All that to say the Lord was right there in the midst. He saved my SS from a gang attack and blessed him with great wisdom and favor on the inside. God is so faithful.
That being said you can only do so much. Grieve whatever you need to grieve, then pick your chin up. Hold your head high and know nothing will come between you and Gods destiny for you. This is only a blip on the radar of Gods mighty calling on your life. You will now be blessing other moms with your wisdom in this department. There is no telling how the Lord will use you. Don’t stay in this place of shock , for lack of a better word. It is what it is. The Lord will use this to His glory. It is His strength carrying you. When you look in the mirror see Jesus looking back at you for you reflect His image. He is in and with you and leading you step by step.
I’ve been active in women’s prison ministry awhile and it has truly been a major blessing in my life. Pray for the inmates to have personal one-on-one life-changing encounters with Jesus and know His great love.
Thank you so much for the encouragement. Our whole family has indeed been affected by this experience. Fortunately, that has led to some good things as well as the difficult ones.
I’d like to say I’m working on my sex life- I was really making progress before all this virus stuff began- but I’m not. And that’s not great for my high drive husband. I tell him I’m trying but I’m frozen. My anxiety is higher than ever and I actually have some depression-type feelings too. He has been SO patient, as I’ve promised sex and pushed it off and off due to anxiety or exhaustion. I’d love to take it off the table right now but when I talk to him about that he points out that we already don’t do anything anyway. Which is true since this began. Last night, I had a panic attack when he rolled on top of me and started to kiss me. And he felt so offended and hurt. And I felt so bad for hurting him. It was a physical response I couldn’t control it. I have no history of abuse that I know of. I’ve never had a panic attack during physical intimacy. I feel even worse now.
I’d like to say there’s some question or insight here, but I kind of just have to vent to a community who may actually understand. Thanks for being an encouragement and a light!
I’m so sorry I missed seeing this comment so long ago. 🙁 I’ve had a few panic attacks during sex. I developed a few tools to prepare myself for how to respond if it happened again, and that helped immensely. I hope you are able to figure something out to help you as well.