The beginning of my decision and efforts to make changes in our marriage bed coincided with another change in my life: the right anti-depressant.
I’d struggled with mild depression off and on for a while. I’d even been on one anti-depressant for a couple years. However, it interfered with my sexual response, so in an early effort to try to want sex more and thereby make my husband happy, I went off them.
A lot of women fight the idea of anti-depressants: “I should be able to cope with the stresses of life without a pill.” “Who wants to be happy all the time?” “What if it doesn’t actually work and I’ve gotten my hopes up for nothing?” “I don’t want my personality to change.”
An anti-depressant corrects a chemical imbalance. The right one doesn’t make me happy, and it doesn’t change my personality in any way. All it does it adjust my brain to where I am able to cope with life stuff in a normal fashion. That’s all. It’s no different than the HRT I take to give me a healthy level of estrogen or the potassium pills my husband takes.
When I was on the right anti-depressant, it became easier for me to see what was happening in my marriage and recognize that just maybe there was something I could do.
If your marriage is suffering because you are controlling your marriage bed, talk with your doctor to make sure your body and mind are the best they can be in order to make some changes.
For more thoughts on depression and what churches can do, see CNN’s Belief Blog.