My husband called me on his way home from choir practice. “I’m going past Dairy Queen. Would you like me to stop and get us some ice cream?”
We’d been doing pretty well on our lower-carb eating plan for this year, and our doctor has encouraged us to build occasional treats into our diet. Ice cream is one of my favorite treats to enjoy.
Waiting is a joy, too.
I hung up the phone (after saying “yes,” of course) and pictured the ice cream I would soon have in front of me. I practically salivated as I awaited my ice cream. Okay, not practically salivated. I actually salivated. My mouth was ready for some tasty creamy Dairy Queen. While I waited for my husband to arrive home, I was so excited. My taste buds were ready.
If Big Guy had walked in the door and surprised me with my ice cream, I would have been just as happy. It would have been just as lovely and creamy even if I hadn’t known it was coming.
Still, knowing what was coming my way made me happy before my ice cream even got to me. It made me hum. It made me more light-hearted in getting a few chores done while I waited.
Big Guy didn’t give me only the gift of ice cream to enjoy.
He also gave me the gift of anticipation.
Plan a sex date!
I’d like to encourage you to look for a time to add anticipation into your sex life. Plan a major sex date.
If your husband appreciates you initiating sex, handling the planning yourself can have a big impact—but planning together can be a lot of fun as well.
Designate a time during the next few weeks when you and your husband can have a couple hours completely alone. Make arrangements that are needed: recruit friends or relatives to take kids off your hands, reserve a room at a local hotel, or rearrange your work schedules.
Plan something special that you know he will appreciate and that you will enjoy doing. Tell him what it is, and then prepare yourself for it.
- If you’re going to strip for him, gather your attire together and practice taking it off seductively. (Just a note: no matter how silly you might feel, it will probably be seductive to him.)
- Trying out a new toy together? Learn how to operate it. Be sure it is charged and that you have the right kind of artificial lubricant needed if that will be part of your toy use.
- Are you going to wear new lingerie? Get some good quality sexy stuff from one of my Christian lingerie affiliate links at Honoring Intimates or Marriage Spice. Make sure you try it on and know how to operate any hooks or laces. (You don’t want to be rushing around trying to figure out how to get those little hooks on the back to work while your husband is on the way up the stairs. You just don’t. You might end up throwing your back out. Trust me on this.)
- Are you planning a new hair style to try out on your man? Shop ahead as needed, or make sure to schedule an appointment with your aesthetician.
- If you’re going to give oral sex a try for the first time, or for the first time in a long while, practice getting more comfortable with your husband’s penis and prepare yourself to do some oral blessing.
- Adding new sexy talk? Practice saying some things out loud.
- Are you planning to touch yourself in front of your husband? Start working up to it
- Do you want to be assertive and let your husband know what you would like? Tell him now.
Whatever you are planning to do, talk about your plans early and often. It lets your husband know that you are looking forward to your sex date—and it helps you think about it as well.
Even though you’ll likely be having sex a few times before the big sex date, you can use the next few weeks to do some major teasing.
Flash him. Let him watch you try on the lingerie. Whisper some of the sexy words you’re working on. When no one else is looking, let your husband see you practice your oral sex moves on a banana or cucumber.
The gift of anticipation is for both of you.
I recently planned a sexual encounter for us. It wasn’t a huge sex date because I planned it only a day in advance, but it involved a couple new items/activities. I told Big Guy when it was going to happen. I told him what I had planned and showed him what I would be wearing. I talked about it several times during the following day. I texted him to let him know I was looking forward to it.
The anticipation was something I did as much for me as for my husband. It helped me be mentally prepared for sex, and that helped prepare me to really enjoy it.
I planned our encounter for right after he got home from work. When he walked in the door, he did so with a light step and a smile on his face.
If I’d surprised him with sex, or if it had spontaneously happened, we would have enjoyed it a lot, too. It is lovely even when I don’t know it is going to happen. The anticipation extended our shared enjoyment over a longer period of time—and that added to the fun.
So plan a big sex date with your husband soon, okay? You’ll enjoy the anticipation as well as the sex!
Image credit | Christianpics.co
I've moved! While you can peruse the archives here, I am no longer posting at The Forgiven Wife.
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Ladies, if you're interested in joining me for a study of Juli Slattery's new book God, Sex, and Your Marriage, time is running out! Our study begins with introductions on February 26, 2023, but the study will be open to join until March 5.
